sâmbătă, 11 aprilie 2009

red shoes cinderella syndrome

you wake up on this narrow leather couch in this perfect huge house with glass doors and leather armchairs you look around and see the remote controls and the big window,
oh canada waters canada waters, thames is bigger than u knew it when u look outside, it's like the house is on a deck the house is big but you are cold
it seems it is impossible to sleep in a bed or get a blanket in such a big fancy house
omg you miss your little green marker
the kid went to the bathroom he is probably puking and you look at the perfect glass doors and perfect glass tables and the tv in the corner, and at the leather armchair with another leather armchair in front of it to keep ur feet up,
ur only concern is not to loose ur earing the golden heart u found in hyde park,
u know it's loose, it's already off, you pick it up from the couch, put it on, take your shoes and jacket and run. close the doors. on the entrance stairs there are some elegant women's red shoes, u are sorry u didn't take ur camera, three big red pairs of shoes on the first three steps size 40
its 7 o'clock in the morning the air is cold and u walk fast look at the houses, there is a rich area near canada waters, with a walking pier, looks strange, perfectly still, cars are parked, people asleep, lots of big glass doors and interior stairs,
big cars and perfect gardens,
walk and feel trapped, walk and feel one more time that shit in your chest asking you what CAN you do, what should you do, all these are there and they won't change, people just won't change and you are powerless in front of everything the big red houses who are like so material so strong and big with their big perfect door glasses, wtf can u do with or without your little green marker, this is really like a big joke, cherry gardens and another walking pier,
oh canada waters you just talked to me this morning through your perfect red shoes, and then walk and walk and walk,
some guy walks with you and tries to convince yo to be his "babymother",
he decides to respect your choice not to be the mother of his children, his name is victor and he is a nice guy until he decides that you can be his first true love,
then he stops to pee near a wall, and you run away one more time, get the bus and go home
i have the cinderella syndrome my friends told me

miercuri, 8 aprilie 2009

rest in peace alex

no alex godri is not on the internet he didn't get there just yet father an international singer u find the father on the internet but he didn't get there just yet no profile pictures no wall to write. he now a ghost died last week so did george costea told me called me and said- bai am o veste cam proasta. a murit alex. and so RIP or how they say it, i'm sorry i didn't find you any weed in vama veche last summer, alex, i'm sorry that u had all those shitty problems, i'm sorry that i thought you went crazy when i saw you at tnb and that i felt sorry for you. we all the sane and alive know that so well right? sorry for many things. i'm sorry now i didn't kiss you 5 years ago when we were dancing breakfast at tiffanys in vama veche and you rolled on the sand laughing and u then had no worries, you talked to me about life and about the stars on the sky and about all the wonderful things you want to do in life, and about the trust you have in you and about how wonderful life is, i was looking at you and you were so beautiful, we talked for hours then, you were in love with one of mircea toma's daughters and everything was so great for you back then. i'm sorry for all the sorrow. i will forget about your death as quickly as i forgot about my grandmother's death because i can't think about it. i will delete you alex from all the memories and crop you from all the pictures and maybe in a few years i will come back at these memories again. or when i will meet with catinca or george or barna or andreea or sma or ciprian or the others, and think about you. rest in peace. they say that even if you don't believe a prayer, if you say it many times, it does something, so rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace rest in peace alex.

pop corn

what i learned lately FFW

how to make spanish omlette, butter is good and sometimes can save the day, u can make polenta at dean house, club literar is still alive, reading the newspapers can provide instant charmingly intellingent thoughts, good for self esteem, blue hair dye is back( and i'm back to blue), stealing clothes and books is actually much easier than i expected, bob dylan was a charmer, rupaul is one hack of a dragqueen, i started talking with "girl" after seeing rupaul's dragshow, the greenline at greenwich is the meridian line, i like little britain, weed is good, speed is for free and rave parties have their own providers, the person who was killed around new cross was stabbed 196 times, you have to eat different textures if u wanna loose weight, i don't give a shit about "professional well trained" community artists, doing community arts is something very personal, i would like to sleep rough for a few days to see how it really is, the guys from creme cafe are stupid because they say they "don't sell israelian products but they are not fascists, all the jews are welcome", fuck off, johnny rotten did a commercial for butter, i like little britain, the sky in london is very colorful, you have to eat regularly so not to fuck up your stomach, but i just don't think i am ready for this yet, london is a fat lady, london is a selfish slut, hackney has a new pond thanks to the olympics, peter pan is magic and wendy is alive and old, david bowie sings so beautifully "alabama song", david bowie is nice, david bowie is a vampire, i should wear more scarves on my head, they look good on me, i definitely should make that tatoo on my right hand and i think it's gonna be a diamond, making plasticine little toys can help get rid of anxiety, fassbinder was totally right with his thing about love, a millionaire killed his wife and daughter in their sleep because he didn't want them to find out that they are bankrupt over night, then he set himself and his house on fire, ceburashka is definitely a figure that's gonna follow me through all my life so i'd better get used to that, thanks misha, andy warhol was not an insensitive bitch, that's for all the sensitive haters out there, "cultural diversity" is one of the most hypocrite terms ever invented until now for "intolerance" and "tolerance" is the most lame term invented until now for "if i had a red button that would erase u from the face of the earth i would push it right now", silence is sometimes golden, people are obsessed with themselves and only with themselves and that is not that bad after all, indians have the weirdest fruit alive, the cakes from brick lane are sooo good, having sex should be something everybody has the right to practice at least 5 times a week morning/evening, having children can be a total trauma for adults, i like my mother, i like takin pictures of people and making them feel good, street dance is really complicated, you got served is a popular street dance movie, kidulthood is a stupid movie, sweet sixteen is a great movie, kids wanna kill adults, kids wanna have children and kill the adults, playing pool is one of the best things in the world, i should get red bright nail polish, squirrels are robots, and brixton is great.